It’s almost time for the scariest night of the year, prom, and I bullied a bunch of youths into telling me who they’d rather take to the prom: the one on the left or the one on the right.
Six out of six youths responded the one on the right and when they turned the tables on me, I lectured them: “The one on the left, man. That’s the one that knows how to party. Plus, you’d be the talk of the prom. Don’t you know anything? People would remember you.”
“Yeah,” the youths said, “But the one on the right has normal skin.”
I also explained to these youths that since the theme of the prom is French, the one on the left’s white face goes with it. You are supposed to go to the prom dressed as a mime. DON’T TALK. NOBODY TALK AT THE PROM. DANCE LIKE YOU’RE IN A BOX.
Also, in honor of our impending Easter, I think it’s necessary to rethink OF MICE AND MEN.
There’s this video I once saw of BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN acted out by rabbits. They named it BROKEBUNNY MOUNTAIN, I think. Well, there should be a version of OF MICE AND MEN where the humans are rabbits and the rabbits are humans.
“I can still tend the humans, George? I didn’t mean no harm, George.”